Why Slowing Down Is a Healthy Way to Begin the New Year?
- Jennifer Brown
- 19 hours ago
- 6 min read
January has a way of arriving with a bang. New goals, plans, and a quiet pressure to “start
strong.” And yet, if I’m honest, the last two weeks of December reminded me of something we often forget, even when we know better: slowing down is not as easy as we think, even when we desperately need it.
This year, my oldest son came home from his first year in the Navy. Without hesitation, I slipped right into mom mode, trying to pack in his favorite meals, favorite places, and time with all the people he loves. My nervous system was fully in go mode, focused on making the most of every moment.
Meanwhile, he was perfectly content chilling, watching movies, and getting his tattoos
completed. I was moving quickly out of love and habit, while he was grounded, present, and
completely unbothered by the need to maximize every moment. It forced me to pause and
notice what was actually happening in my body.
I had intentionally set aside time to rest and be present with my family, yet staying still felt harder than I expected. My mind kept scanning for what needed to happen next, and my body struggled to settle. And that’s the part I want to name first:
Knowing what to do and doing it in the moment are not the same thing when your nervous system automatically shifts into high alert.
This isn’t about insight or awareness. It’s about physiology.
Allow me to Reintroduce Myself
If this is your first time here, I want to take a moment to reintroduce myself. I’m Jennifer Nicole Brown, founder and a therapist at Perfectly Imperfect Counseling Services. I work with women who carry a great deal for their families, their work, and their communities, often at the expense of themselves. My work focuses on helping women understand their nervous systems, recognize long-standing patterns that keep them stuck in overdrive, and learn how to move toward balance without guilt or burnout.
I don’t approach this work only as a clinician, but as a woman who knows what it means to hold many roles at once. Like many of the women I support, I’m a wife, a mom, a business owner, a mentor, a friend, a sister, and a daughter. I love these roles deeply. And at the same time, I’ve learned, sometimes the hard way, that fulfilling them well requires tending to the woman underneath all of them.
That understanding is what shapes how I think about rest, pacing, and intentional change. Not as something we earn after exhaustion, but as something our nervous systems need to function, connect, and heal
Understanding the Three Nervous System States (and Why They Matter)
Our nervous system is always working behind the scenes to keep us safe. It moves between different states depending on what it perceives as stress, safety, connection, or threat.
Understanding these states helps us stop judging ourselves and start responding with care.
The Activated State (Sympathetic Nervous System)
This is the state most women know well. It’s the go mode.
In the body, it can look like tension, shallow breathing, racing thoughts, irritability,
restlessness, and trouble sleeping.
Emotionally, it can feel like: urgency, anxiety, pressure to keep moving, difficulty slowing down.
This state is not bad; it helps us meet demands. The problem is when we live here for too long. Over time, the body gets tired of staying on alert.
The Rest-and-Repair State (Parasympathetic Nervous System)
This is where the body recovers.
In the body, it feels like: deeper breathing, softer muscles, improved digestion, clearer
thinking.
Emotionally, it feels like calm, presence, connection, and the ability to enjoy rest without guilt.
It’s impossible to be in this state at all times, but it is the state many of us want to be in, but don’t always know how to access, especially if slowing down has never felt fully safe.
The Shutdown State (When the System Gets Overwhelmed)
When activation lasts too long without relief, the body may shift into shutdown.
This can look like: exhaustion, numbness, low motivation, brain fog, withdrawal.
It’s not laziness, it’s the body conserving energy after prolonged stress.
Understanding this helps us recognize that burnout isn’t a personal failure; it’s a physiological response.
What the Body Needs to Move Out of Constant Arousal
You don’t think your way out of these states; you support your way out. Even though we try to think our way through stress, our nervous system is actually processing most of what’s
happening, around 80%, while our thinking brain only has access to a small portion of the full picture.
To move from activation back toward rest and regulation, the body needs:
Slowness without pressure
Moments of safety and predictability
Reduced demands, even temporarily
Permission to rest without earning it
Connection to yourself or others without expectations
This is why my December break mattered. It wasn’t indulgent. It was corrective. It gave my
nervous system a chance to downshift, even when parts of me resisted. That resistance didn’t mean I was doing it wrong. It meant my system was integrating something different.
Listening to the Body Instead of Pushing Past It
When we feel more connected to our bodies, we start to recognize how stress shows up
physically, such as tight shoulders, shallow breathing, restlessness, fatigue, and irritability.
These are messages. Learning how to release tension and emotion that’s been held in the body is part of healing and sustainable change.
Instead of asking ourselves to push harder, we can begin asking:
What does my body need right now?
Where am I holding tension?
What would support my system instead of overwhelming it?
This is what nervous system pacing looks like in real life.
A Realistic Way to Set Intentions for 2026 WITHOUT Resolutions
Intentions are different from resolutions.
Resolutions often come from pressure;
intentions come from awareness. They’re less about fixing yourself and more about listening to what you need as you move forward.
Start with how you want to feel, not what you want to accomplish.
Ask yourself:
How do I want to feel more often this year?
What feels heavy that I want to experience less of?
Choose one or two intentions that feel supportive
If it feels overwhelming, it’s too much. Simplicity helps your nervous system stay engaged.
Use a grounding question as a guide if it feels better
You don’t need a new routine, just a check-in:
What do I need right now?
Let the answer change. Let it be imperfect. That flexibility is part of the work.
Expect discomfort without making it mean you’re failing.
If slowing down feels hard, that doesn’t mean your intention is wrong. It often means your
nervous system is learning a new pace.
When we rethink goals through a nervous-system-informed lens, the focus shifts from doing more to feeling supported while we move. Honoring your capacity is what makes change sustainable.
Closing Words
So as 2026 begins, I invite you to pause and ask:
What do I need right now?
What pace feels supportive, not punishing?
You don’t need a full plan.
You don’t need to rush.
You don’t need to prove anything.
You’re allowed to begin gently. And if slowing down feels uncomfortable, that doesn’t mean
you’re doing it wrong; it means your nervous system is learning something new. That learning deserves patience.
If you’re looking for gentle, body-supportive resources as you begin the year, these are a
few I often suggest. Take what resonates and leave the rest.
Resource Recommendations
Insight Timer - This is a free app that offers thousands of guided meditations, grounding practices, and soundscapes designed to support rest and nervous system regulation. I personally use it for sleep sounds, especially during seasons when my body needs help settling at night. The gentle music, ambient noise, and ambient soundscapes make it easier to wind down without feeling like you have to “do” anything or get it right. It can be a supportive option for moments when if slowing down doesn’t come naturally. Download here
My Grandmother’s Hands by Resmaa Menakem - This book offers a powerful, body-based understanding of how stress, trauma, and survival responses live in the bodies of Black people and other communities of color. Rather than focusing only on thoughts or behaviors, it helps readers notice what the body is holding—and why certain reactions feel automatic. Many women find this book especially meaningful when learning to slow down and listen to their bodies with compassion instead of judgment. It invites awareness, grounding, and healing at a pace that honors history, lived experience, and the wisdom of the body. Read here
Let's Stay Connected
Thank you for taking the time to read and reflect with us. If this post resonated with you, the team at Perfectly Imperfect Counseling Services and EmpowerHer Society invites you to stay connected.
Visit our websites:
Stay in touch on social media, too! ✨ Follow EmpowerHer Society on Instagram @theempowerhersociety ✨ Connect with founder Jennifer Nicole on Instagram @sheisjennifernicole or on LinkedIn Jennifer Nicole Brown.
Disclaimer
The resources mentioned in this post are shared because they could be helpful and have been found personally valuable by the team. Perfectly Imperfect Counseling Services is a therapy practice dedicated to providing compassionate, trauma-informed therapy for women and teen girls. EmpowerHer Society was created as a space for community, self-love, empowerment, and balance.
Other than these programs, the practice is not affiliated with the resources listed and does not receive compensation for sharing them. They are provided solely for informational purposes to support personal growth and well-being. Readers are encouraged to explore them and decide if they align with their needs.
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